Urban Legends

[WitchBoy]

Baby with a bullet

I heard the following story that supposedly occured during a battle during the Civil War of the United States: a Union soldier was shot in the groin area. The bullet passed through one of his testicles destroying it. This bullet travelled on and struck a young woman, passing through her uterus. This bullet deposited sperm within her uterus resulting in pregnancy. She carried the child to term. After the war she met this aforementioned soldier and they compared notes. They determined that the child was his and they married, living hapily ever after.

[WitchBoy]

Murder in the dark

Two girls are roommates in the college dorms. One girl leaves to go to the library or off on a date, sometimes even to work. Some time passes and she has to go back to her room to retrieve something: a jacket, her purse, or a forgotten book. Knowing exactly where the object is she does not turn the light on. Sometimes the story goes that when she left her roommate was asleep or is sick and not turning the light on is a courtesy to her. When the roommate finally returns to the room for the night there are police outside her door. When she looks in the room she sees her roommate brutally murdered and written (sometimes in lipstick, but more often in blood) on the wall are the eerie words “Aren’t you glad you didn’t turn on the lights?” suggesting that the killer was in the room when she dashed back in for the forgotten item.

This is a real oldie

[WitchBoy]

Do you believe in Mary Worth?

A typical rendition of the Mary Worth scare-story will usually begin with the details of a woman named Mary who was horribly disfigured and / or killed in an accident.
Her tormented spirit can be summoned, the story claims, by standing in front of a mirror and chanting her name a prescribed number of times (sometimes 3, 5, 9, 13 times and so on). When you have spoken her name for the 3rd (or 5th or 9th...) time you will either see her terrible face in the mirror (and die of fright etc) or she will appear from the mirror and claw your face.

The film Candyman is based on this legend

[WitchBoy]

The joy of necrophilia?

I recall a story in which a young woman is involved in an accident and is pronounced dead. Her corpse is sent to the morgue where-in a morgue worker with unusual sexual tastes initiates sex with it (her?). Mid-way through his supposedly necrophilic activity the woman revives -- she has been in a 'near-death coma' and, apparently, his commotion has woken her from that state. Later, the woman's parents are so grateful that their daughter awoke from the coma prior to being buried / cremated that they dissuade her from pressing rape / sexual assault charges against the morgue attendant, whose necrophilic efforts they credit with her revival.

[WitchBoy]

Hooked On Murder!

A young couple sneak away to a country road or a Lover’s Lane for a few minutes of making out. Either on the way there or after they arrive a special news bulletin cuts into the song on the radio and alerts everyone in the area of a killer on the loose. Sometimes he is an escaped convict from the nearby prison; sometimes he is an escaped lunatic from a nearby asylum; sometimes he is even a sex maniac. The radio announcer warns everyone to be on the lookout and not go outside if you don’t have to. The killer is recognizable because he has a hook for a hand (whether the hook is on the left or right is one of the variables in this tale). The girl gets real nervous and tells her boyfriend they should go home. He pleads with her to stay. A little argument ensues and eventually the girl wins. The guy, feeling very frustrated at the make out session going awry, is said to have "gunned" the engine and "peeled" out of there. When they arrive home sometimes the girl gets out of the car herself, because the boyfriend is angry and won’t do the courtesy act of opening her door, but sometimes he does open her door for her. Either way, there is a bloody hook dangling from the door handle - they had barely escaped! If not for the girl’s insistence they would have been killed. The speed and recklessness of which he drove away is a key element because it is what causes the hook to be ripped from the killer’s arm. This one factor is always a constant no matter who tells the tale.

[WitchBoy]

Finger licking good

There was this old woman who lived all alone, actually, she wasn't all alone because she lived with her pet dog. Every night she would put the dog under her bed, where it slept. Each night it would lick her hand goodnight.

One night, after getting a reassuring lick, she fell asleep. She woke several minutes later to a dripping sound. She checked the whole house and eventually found where the dripping was coming from. Her dog had been killed and was hanging from the shower curtain, its blood dripping into the drain. She ran back to her room and looked under the bed. There was a psychopath under there and he had licked her hand.

[WitchBoy]

Say it with flowers

A woman works for a very large company as an incoming telephone consultant. One day she upsets a customer, who becomes hostile. She terminates the call and soon forgets about it. Several days later a bunch of flowers arrives for her at work. As she is leaving the building that afternoon, carrying the flowers, the customer attacks / kills her. He has used the flowers as a means of identifying her.

[WitchBoy]

Dread those locks

A young man with untidy dreadlocks begins to experience an itchy scalp. He puts up with it for as long as he can and finally can't stand it anymore. He goes to a hairdresser who says she will have to cut most of the dreadlocks out. He regretfully agrees. Once the hair is off the two of them discover a nest of spiders in the cuttings, which had been causing the scalp irritation!

[WitchBoy]

The Bridegroom's Revenge

Apparently, a man and a woman had a huge wedding. When they were at the reception and it was time for the best man's speech, the groom stood up instead. He said he knew it was highly irregular that he was speaking, but he had something to say. He wanted everyone to know that the wedding was totally legal and on the up and up. The man with him, he continued, was his divorce lawyer. If the wedding guests would all flip over their plates, they would see the reason. With that, he tossed off his champagne and walked out.

On the bottom of every plate was a picture of the bride and best man walking into a cheap motel room together. The electronic date on the photo was three days before the wedding.

[WitchBoy]

The Face In The Window

This girl was home all alone watching TV on a cold winter night. The television was right beside a sliding glass door, and the blinds were open.

Suddenly she saw a wrinkled old man staring at her through the glass! She screamed, then grabbed the phone next to the couch and pulled a blanket over her head so the guy couldn't see her while she called the police. She was so terrified that she remained under the blanket until the police got there.

It had snowed a lot during the day, so the police naturally decided to look for footprints. But there were no footprints at all on the snowy ground outside the sliding door.

Puzzled, the police went back inside the house – and that's when they saw the wet footprints on the floor leading up to the couch where the girl was still sitting.

The policemen looked at each other nervously. "Miss, you're extremely lucky," one of them finally said to her.

"Why?" she asked.

"Because," he said, "the man wasn't outside at all. He was in here, standing right behind the couch! What you saw in the window was his reflection."

[WitchBoy]

Pop Rock and Soda

A kid ate 6 bags of pop rocks at a party. He then proceeded to drink a 6-pack of Pepsi. The two substances combined in his stomach and exploded, killing him horribly. That's why pop rocks were taken off the market in the early eighties.

[WitchBoy]

Which Tire?

Two students decide to go skiing for the weekend, and are having such a good time they decide to blow off the (calculus, I believe) exam that they have scheduled for Monday morning in order to get some final runs in before they head back to school. They decide to tell the prof that they got a flat tire and therefore deserve to take the exam at a rescheduled time.

Hearing the story, said professor agrees that it really was just bad luck, and of course they can take the exam later. At the appointed time, the prof greets them and places them in two separate rooms to take the exam.

The few questions on the first page are worth a minor 10% of the overall grade, and are quite easy. Each student grows progressively confident as they take the test, sure that they have gotten away with fooling the professor. However, when they turn to the second page they discover that they really haven't.

The only question on the page, worth 90% of the exam, reads: "Which tire?"

[WitchBoy]

Flunk Me If You Can

A student is having a very hard time writing a final exam. So hard, in fact, that he continues to write a full five minutes after the professor has called "Pencils down." The professor, tired of waiting, picks up the pile of exams and begins to walk out of the room. Seeing this, the student finishes up and rushes, paper in hand, to the professor, only to find that his exam will not be accepted.

After the professor explains to the distraught student that he has violated academic code by writing past the finishing time, the student asks him: "Do you have any idea who I am?"

The professor answers, "No. But I'll have a pretty good idea what your name is when I record your failing grade."

With that, the student knocks the finished exams out of the professors hands, mixes his in with the pile, and runs out of the room.

Rumour has it, he got a B+.

[Freya]

LMAO! THose are grand.. I like the one with the roomate and the figer licken' good.!!!!! They are great!! The others aswell but those two were my fav.