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Post by Teej on Oct 11, 2002 23:45:56 GMT -5
A brunette is jumping on a curb and off, back and forth, while chanting 21..... 21...... 21.......
A blond walks up and sees all the fun this brunette is having and starts jumping and chanting as well. Pretty soon a truck comes by. The brunette stops jumping in time to escape but the blond just keeps jumping back and forth and gets hit by the truck.
Then the brunette starts jumping back and forth again chanting 22...... 22....... 22........
Teej
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Post by Nemesis on Oct 13, 2002 17:53:53 GMT -5
hehehe ;D
A blonde is giving birth, she's pushing real hard but it goes slowly..
When the doctor finally sees the babies head he says: "Oh.. it got curly hear.. did you do it with a nigger?"
The blonde answers: "Yep, but only one time."
Then the body comes out, but its yellow and the doctor says: "Oh.. it's yellow too.. did you also do it with a Chinese?"
And the blonde answers; "Yep.. but only one time."
Then the legs pop out.. and the doctor says:
"Hey.. how odd.. the legs are red.. did you also do it with a Indian?"
And again the blonde answers; "Yep.. but only one time."
After the hard labour the doctor cuts the birthstring and spanks the baby on his ass. Then baby starts crying, and the blonde says:
"FFfffiew.. I already was affraid it started barking!"
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Post by Teej on Oct 13, 2002 20:16:01 GMT -5
lol Now that is a good one. ;D
Teej
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Post by LoTu on Oct 14, 2002 13:11:53 GMT -5
i think im gonna be sick now!!!
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Post by Freya on Oct 15, 2002 9:28:08 GMT -5
awwwwwww man! That's sick but hilarious.. poor blonds.. really!! *says while shaking her head*
but.. anymore?
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Post by Teej on Oct 17, 2002 16:27:26 GMT -5
There is a mirror in a restaraunt of New York, and if you walk up to it and say the truth, you will get whatever you desire. But if you go up to it and say a lie, then you will disappear forever.
A brunette walks up to it and says "I think I am the most beautiful woman in the world."
POOF she disappears.
A redhead walks up to the mirror and says "I think I have the best legs in the world."
POOF she disappears as well.
A blond walks up to the mirror and says "I think-"
POOF she disappears.
Teej
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Post by Teej on Oct 17, 2002 18:07:34 GMT -5
1.How do you drown a blond?
Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottem of a pool OR put a mirror at the bottem of a pool.
2.What did the fish say when it swam into the wall?
Dam.
3.How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None they just sit in the dark and bitch.
4.How do you fit three blonds on one stool?
Turn the stool upside down.
Teej
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Post by Freya on Oct 19, 2002 9:24:02 GMT -5
I'd say otherwise on this one! I'm not known for bitching!
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Post by Teej on Oct 20, 2002 13:58:42 GMT -5
Well there are exceptions  Teej |
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Post by Chaos_Childe on Oct 21, 2002 14:40:25 GMT -5
Here are some signs and notices written in English that were supposedly discovered throughout the world.
In a Yugoslavian hotel:
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In a Japanese hotel:
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
On the menu of a Polish hotel:
Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.
In a Bangkok dry cleaner's:
Drop your trousers here for best results.
In a Zurich hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
In a Rome laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.
Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand:
Would you like to ride on your own ass?
In a Bangkok temple:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.
In a Copenhagen airline ticket office:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
In a Budapest zoo:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
In an Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner:
Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.
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Post by Teej on Oct 21, 2002 21:13:20 GMT -5
lol Those were good chaos.
Teej
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Ravenwolfe
United Member
Eclectic Wiccan
Posts: 80
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Post by Ravenwolfe on Oct 22, 2002 3:37:05 GMT -5
Bravo Chaos..........had me practically falling out of my chair!!! ;D
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Post by Nemesis on Oct 22, 2002 8:15:38 GMT -5
hehehe ;D The Japanese control yerself was good, as was the Swiss wine 
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Post by Chaos_Childe on Oct 22, 2002 14:20:24 GMT -5
Thank you people ;D
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Post by Teej on Oct 22, 2002 21:09:05 GMT -5
I heard about how this one time the Pope visited Mexico once. These people made these shirts that said 'I saw the Pope' in Spanish. But they forgot to capitalize the papa in 'il papa' so it came out to be 'I saw the potato.'
Teej
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